At over six years sober, I’ve found that one of the most challenging—and rewarding—parts of recovery is learning to sit with feelings sober. So many of us with addictions get used to numbing or distorting our feelings. During active addiction, we used drugs or alcohol to do this, but even in sobriety we can rely on behaviors to help us numb out. If you’re not accustomed to feeling your emotions, it can be scary. The process of learning to do so isn’t straightforward or linear, but any work you put into it is an investment in your well-being. Bottling or blunting emotions can feel like the safer route in the moment, but ultimately it’s terrible for your mental health. According to the popular therapy app Talkspace, feeling your feelings helps you make smarter decisions, connect with others, and experience the full range of the human experience. They go on to say, “Over time and with practice, you’ll be able to better understand what is causing you to feel a certain way. Pausing, reflecting, and taking stock of sensations throughout your body during an intense situation will allow you to start making cognitive connections to the feelings you have in response to them. Some people find writing in a journal or another artistic practice to be effective ways to start recognizing their emotions, the circumstances that have triggered them, and how it’s left them feeling.”[1] This is important, because there’s sitting with your emotions, and then there’s understanding them. Both are essential parts of emotional awareness, and while they can seem overwhelming, there are concrete ways to practice them. My therapist suggests identifying the physical sensations that accompany an emotion, and sending breath and compassion to those areas. Focusing on the physical sensation takes me out of my head, where I can get lost overthinking the emotion rather than feeling it. Regularly meditating can also help you strengthen the muscle of sitting with your feelings, as it is about allowing all your emotions and sensations to just be, without judgement. It can seem counterintuitive to suggest sitting with your feelings without overthinking, but also learning to understand them. I can struggle with the balance between these two things sometimes. However, the methods Talkspace suggested—such as journaling or engaging in an artistic practice—are ways to dive into the emotions rather than numb out. And when you regularly engage your emotions, over time, understanding them becomes more intuitive. One of many wonderful things about sobriety is that it allows you to connect to your whole experience and feel like you’re really living your life. Feeling your emotions fully means that you’ll be able to experience true joy when it comes, and connect to your life on a much deeper level. If you are struggling with a substance use or mental health disorder, there is help and hope. TruHealing Centers offers high-quality treatment for addiction and mental health disorders in facilities across the country. Our staff—many of whom are in recovery themselves—will help you get and stay sober. To learn more, call an admissions specialist at 410-593-0005. [1] https://www.talkspace.com/blog/difference-between-feelings-emotions/
